~being a beach butterfly~

Sunday, November 28, 2004

It's a hot sticky evening.. the first of many for this notorious Aussie summer. I suck on my enth ciggie of the night. I stand in the balcony of our flat and gaze out at the night. i try to locate my star - u know - the middle star in orion's belt. I can't see it. It's cloudy tonight.. like everyone's mood.

For some reason everyone's nostalgic tonight. We're all bored.. even the Seinfeld Marathon that runs from 6 - 6 fails to cheer us up. It might be the heat, humidity has a way of creeping up on you and dampening your mood.

Larla retires to the room, I am left plopped down on the malnourished beanbag trying to muster some laughter that the silly antics of Seinfeld deserve. Ron - my beloved flat mate and best friend - comes home from a full day's work. His mood is as foul as mine and we bitch at each other for all it's worth. Soon enough, He kisses me goodnight and gets the sleep he so needed. And I am alone again with my nostalgia and my boredom.

I step back out to our balcony to catch the measely breeze that the night offers. With my trusty Winfield Special Milds i contemplate on the bore that is my life.

The moon is full. You can barely see it though as the clouds are crowding it. They're shielding it so that the only light emanatng from it is filtered and scattered. The light from the moon is sufficient though, with it i can see the little hill past our suburb and it casts enough light so the couple walking back to their flat can pick their way through the park.

And then the clouds shift so a tiny ray of moon beam makes its way right where i'm standing. It seems to literally enlghten me. It's telling me that though sometimes clouds crowd me, it doesn't change the fact that the moon, just like my life, is full.

Though my life is far from perfect, it is full. i have my family, my friends, my education and the experiences that have enriched me. I have enough memories to look back on, and enough oppurtunities to look forward to. And though I whine and groan about how miserable my life gets sometimes, i knew at that moment that there are a lot of people who thinks me lucky to be living the life i live. And I should consider myself as such because my life is complete.. and although clouds crowd me too sometimes, i still have enough in me to give enough light to cast on my world.

11/27/04

beachbutterfly babbled @ 5:25 PM |

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: Name: beachbutterfly; Location: Canberra, Australian Capital Territory, Australia

i'm always on the verge of going somewhere else. Not one to settle, i've lived in 7 cities, 4 countries.. and well.. i intend to keep on counting. i live for travelling, shopping, making my parents proud, going to the beach, hanging out with people as insane as i am, boozing and ummm.. having the freedom to be the occasional bum

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